Its been over four years now since I retired. And I find myself considering the changes that have occurred during that period. So many changes, that I could dedicate a series to just this topic. I immediately begin to categorise them - such is the impact of twenty plus years of teaching - revealing a desire for order that will I fear, never totally subside.
My life is more fluid, less predictable and less challenging than during my working years.There are days when I look ahead to the future and I wonder if I retired too soon. I could have twenty plus more years of usefulness left yet I feel under-utilised. There are other days when I savour the relaxed time with friends and family that retirement brings and I can't imagine returning to the days of timetables, lesson plans and meetings.
Now I am no longer in a state of stress. Now I have a healthy lifestyle with a pleasant sprinkling of friends, family and fitness. Living the dream...
But now I am bored!!! I have so much to be thankful for yet I am dissatisfied.
During my career, every four or five years I would find myself facing the challenges of a different grade or a new role. As a mother of four, there were constant changes as the kids grew into adulthood. As a grandmother, I enjoy the delights of babies and toddlers as they grow and change from a different perspective. And as a wife, there was the challenge of balancing an intimate relationship with the busy-ness of work and family.
Now I find, the everyday challenges of my life are far less demanding.
But I need challenges in my life. It is through challenging my boundaries that I grow. I need to learn and to grow, otherwise I stagnate. This is who I am. I want to continue learning until I draw my last breath.
Having recently completed training for some voluntary work, I realise how much I enjoy learning new skills. So now is the time to re-focus my life, to set some goals and to re-examine my priorities. I somehow have lost sight of the possibilities and the potential that is in me. And I want to make each day count, not only in my life, but in the lives of my family, friends and community.
For that I will need God's help so that when my life is nearing its end I can be satisfied and ready to enter into what lies ahead.
